A rough Facebook breakup guide. When defriending an ex, one needs to consider the following factors first. These factors are only consideration on the 'final' break up. A common facebook mistake is to change one's relationship status to single and then re-change the relationship status. This leaves both parties looking a little foolish especially when the relationship status is re-changed back the next day - facebook rookies!
One more thing to consider is, if you delete your ex (or if they delete you) very soon after the break-up people will assume that it was a bad break-up and automatically pry and assume there was a problem on someone behalf. Best thing to do is just give it a bit of time before deletion!
1. If you genuinely think you can continue to be friends with your ex, why not have them on facebook (least common).
2. If you are just saying that so you can Facebook stalk them, do yourself a favour and just delete them (most common).
3. If you still have feelings for them, again delete them off your friends as this will not help your situation.
It is easy and addictive to check up on an ex, if you find yourself looking at their profile even after agreeing to be friends - dont worry, that is 100% normal! However if you find yourelf looking 'excessively' at their profile especially if you don't have any other contact with them, that's not healthy!
One last thing to consider is before deciding to defriend an ex at any point (just after the break up or even years later), it's best to discuss with them that you intend to delete them for whatever reason. Otherwise more unnecessary drama and angst will continue - (unless this is what you intended to do!)
18.104.22.168 20:32, 1 September 2008 (UTC)
I will disagree with the distinguished contributer from 22.214.171.124/16. I think that things like Facebook, MySpace, and so forth use the term "friend" in a very loose way; it's a less technocratic euphemism for "node in social network". Defriending your ex may be satisfying, but only in that petty, rebound-sex kind of way. Really, though, it's just burning bridges, and sometimes you need the perspective of someone who knows you intimately but doesn't really have feelings for you.
--127.0.0.1 20:32, 1 September 2008 (UTC)
IF YOUR "EX" was an actual spouse (through marriage) and/or you've had children with them, if you have remained on friendly terms and communicate, there is no reason to un-friend them. Many people keep former spouses as friends. HOWEVER, if the "ex" was simply an old girlfriend/boyfriend or (yikes!) a one-night-stand that you would much rather forget (because the relationship never went any further), it would be wise to either: 1) un-friend them, or, 2) never friend them in the first place! This is recommended, because in most cases, their friend request is obviously an attempt to insert themselves back into your life, or keep tabs on you. In fact, it is a good idea to warn family members if the "ex" is trying to find their way back into your life, so they can avoid the problems/headaches that friending your "ex" may cause in the long run.